November 2005 - Posts

Review: The Aviator

The Aviator is a big Hollywood production in the classical sense of the word. Just as the big pictures of the Golden Era of Hollywood like The Jazz Singer, Some Like It Hot, and Ocean's Eleven showed off their stars and starlets like Dean Martin, Frank Sinatra, Rita Hayworth, Katharine Hepburn, Errol Flynn, and Ava Gardner, this movie has the look and feel of one of those shows of the past, including a long list of today's stars: Leo DiCaprio, Jude Law, Cate Blanchett, Kate Beckinsale, John C. Reilly, Alec Baldwin, Ian Holm, and even Gwen Stefani. And, of course, in the tradition of great Hollywood directors such as Lewis Milestone, Victor Fleming, Howard Hawks, and Alfred Hitchcock, Martin Scorsese directs.

The Aviator is a biopic about the eccentric Hollywood Golden Boy Howard Hughes. At one point in his life the richest man in the world, Hughes was always fascinated with aviation and film. After inheriting a Houston-based tool company from his father and a phobia of germs from his mother that would become debilitating later on in life, he decided to make the grandest war epic in history. He flew out to Hollywood and proceeded in making the most expensive movie ever made, Hell's Angels. This is just one of the several daring and some would say stupid ventures in his life. This film attempts to chronicle these adventures while also showing the internal struggles he went through in his life. This film is very long, two hours and forty-five minutes long. But it flies by, as you press on, hoping for..I don't know what - lasting happiness for this high-spirited but wounded soul.

What can I say? This movie deserves every Academy Award it won (5 out of 11 nominations). Cate Blanchett is excellent in her role. Leo DiCaprio is also superb. This movie is exciting and moving. I can't believe that the last two movies I've seen are among the greatest movies in their respective categories that I've seen. Of biopics, only Monster and Amadeus beat out The Aviator. And Monster is, perhaps, the best film I've ever seen.

Review: Minority Report

Minority Report has an all-star cast and crew including director Steven Spielberg, editor Michael Kahn, producer Jan de Bont, composer John Williams, and actors Tom Cruise, Colin Farrell, and Steve Harris. Tom Cruise plays a cop in the year 2050 or so in Washington, D.C. Crime has been virtually wiped out because of a new program in D.C. called Pre-Crime. Three psychics suspended in water predict what future murders are going to occur. The only jobs the cops have is to get there in time to prevent the murder. You can see where the public would need complete reassurance that the psychics are completely correct in telling the future. Otherwise, you might get innocent people going to jail. Well, technically, everyone in jail is innocent because they never actually committed a crime. But they thought about committing the crime, which is the same as committing it. But the public has every reassurance that the Pre-Cogs (the three psychics) get it right all the time. What they don't know is that the Pre-Cogs don't always agree. One might see the future different than the other two. In that case, the police ignore the Minority Report. And then, the unthinkable happens. Tom Cruise is accused of killing someone. He, of course, would never kill anyone, so he goes on the run to try to find out who set him up. But did someone set him up? Or is he actually going to be a killer? These questions are not easily answered, and the ensuing adventure is thrilling. This is an exciting movie that builds up insurmountable tension and delivers a poignant, thoughtful, and impactful ending.

The vision of the future is another delightful part of this movie. The technological innovations make sense and seem like things that we could eventually use and live with. For example, Lexus cars are still around, just with a sleeker design. Computer monitors are still around, just flatter than ever, and no more mouse. Cell phones are still around, just small enough that they fit discretely around your ear. The future here is plausible, yet fascinating.

Minority Report is an incredible sci-fi film. It's smart, gripping, and edgy. It's perfectly directed, orchestrated, acted, and written. This is one of the best science fiction films I've seen yet.

Holiday Spirit and the Paradox of Black Friday

It's finally the holiday season. A season of charity and goodwill towards all. A season imbued with the spirit of giving. Jealousies and rivalries forgotten, bad blood cleansed, the fires of compassion stoked. This is the time we prove to God that it's not about US, it's about OTHERS. There's no room for selfishness as Christmas approaches....or is there?

Headlines from Yesterday:

Sale Stampede Sends Shopper to Hospital

Gift fight! C. Fla. cops have to step in

'Pushing and shoving' outside Wal-Mart

Shoving matches bring deputies to Wal-Mart

Two shoppers injured in trampling

I could give you many, many more, but you get the idea, I hope. Black Friday (called thus because it is supposed to be when retailers go into black numbers - i.e. profit) is an opportunity to get a deal on lots of merchandise ranging from electronics to clothing. There are a few catches. One must be willing to wake up early, early in the morning, wait in long lines outside of closed doors in, sometimes, freezing or wet weather, and one must be willing to be forceful and violent, on occasion. If you are willing to do this, then you might get savings in between 10% and 80% off of retail price.

Hugo, Hector, Andrea, and I decided to get into the holiday spirit by waking up around 6 in the morning and going to Cambridgeside Galleria to shop for deals. At one point we contemplated walking the roughly 3 miles to Galleria, but when we saw that the temperature was going to be a bit above 20 Fahrenheit, we decided to take a cab. Split four ways, it cost us $2.50 apiece. Not bad, considering we touched cold air for a total of a minute, maybe.

Once inside, I headed straight for Best Buy. Already, the great deals were gone - computers for 200 dollars, cameras for 100, memory for 20. But people were still fighting over the leftovers. I saw women camped out on top of TV boxes, waiting for the men to return with transportation. I saw children being forced to carry loads of useless (but cheap) gadgets like walkie-talkies, LCD picture frames, off-brand portable DVD players, and crappy movies on DVD. The only thing in the store that I found was a Nintendo Gamecube bundle for only 100 bucks, and Minority Report (a good movie) for five bucks. I didn't need the Gamecube because Thomas is bringing his from home. I decided to take Minority Report to the cash register with me. The line was long, very long. It spanned the entire length of the store - no joke. I made my way to the back of the line and saw the sad rejects, the products that hadn't made the final cut lined up on the wall or put back on random racks. It's so dumb! People just grab stuff, whether they want it or not, just because it's cheap, and in line they realize they have no real use for it, so instead of putting it back, they just toss it aside. I got to the back of the line, and realized I didn't want Minority Report enough to wait in line that long. I tossed it aside, and left.

I ended up going to Suncoast and buying four DVD's for five bucks a piece: A.I., A Beautiful Mind, Minority Report (yappari), and The Pianist. There was no line.

The greed and selfishness of everyone involved on Black Friday is appalling. The businesses, well, are being businesses. Greed and selfishness is just a part of the game for them. Anything to make a buck. But the customers are the same way. Anything to save a buck. Including forgetting that the way to celebrate Christmas is not by getting great deals on gifts so that you have flashier, more expensive gifts to give on Christmas, but by giving gifts that come from a loving, unselfish heart.

The Top Four Sweetest, Most Angelic Singing Voices

I've compiled a list of what I believe to be the sweetest, most angelic singing voices I've ever heard. To hear short clips of their voices and judge for yourself, click on the name under the picture.

husky: utada, janis joplin, tegan and sara

MIT Exams

Unless you really studied, are a genius, or have done the material before taking the class, exams are not about getting complete answers right. You're really happy when you actually get to an answer on the test. What you expect is to apply your knowledge to the problem as fully as you can and get as much partial credit as you can. So with each few points you manage to scrounge here and there, your overall score creeps past failing, past the D mark, the C mark, and usually stops short or just ahead of the B mark. A's are a joyous occassion. A cause for much celebration.

Introductory classes and Humanities classes don't follow the same rules. They are comparatively easy.

Such a Great Surprise - only Daneaya could have done it.

Daneaya is leaving for Thanksgiving a day early, on Wednesday. Before she left, she said she had a gift waiting for me. I wondered what it could be. Before, she gave me an awesome t-shirt with galaxies and stars on it in the shape of Einstein's face. It's an awesome shirt. But she might have topped it this time. For you see, Women's Week at MIT was this past week, and part of the celebration was very prominent members of the MIT community, including Professors Drennan and Guth, wearing t-shirts simply saying "I am a feminist." I really wanted one, but I didn't know where to get one. I was disappointed when Women's Week passed by and I hadn't been able to find one. So tonight Daneaya called me and said if I wanted my surprise I should get it now before she leaves for home. I decided to walk to McCormick in the bitter cold because I knew she was good at giving presents, and I was curious. When she gave me a black bundle, I thought it was a scarf or something similar. But then I unraveled it, and it was a shirt. And then I saw the white word "feminist." My eyes popped open, and I gave a start. I bet she enjoyed the look on my face. I was stunned and delighted. Below is me proudly wearing my new shirt.

Update: Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire

More as the weekend develops, but for now it seems that Goblet of Fire has tied for first place in movies to reach 100 million dollars at the box office the fastest. In three days it has reached a little over 100 million dollars. The other movies at the top of that list are Star Wars Episode 3, Spiderman, and Matrix Reloaded.

Review: Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire

Harry Potter mania is once again hitting the U.S. After a sagging box office trend, studio execs are hoping that the heavy hitters that usually come around the holiday season, this time including Harry Potter, Chronicles of Narnia, King Kong, and Memoirs of a Geisha, will buoy the total receipts for the year. And I suspect that Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire will deliver in a big way. It's a crowd-pleaser in every sense of the word. It has romance, action, adventure, terror, suspense, and, best of all, magic. It lacks better than perfunctory dialogue, which fortunately doesn't detract much from the movie, and something far more important than that - the ability to make us part of the Potter universe.

I enjoyed reading the Harry Potter books. (I've read the first four.) But I could never connect with the characters or with the story on more than a superficial level. The whole thing felt rushed despite going on for several hundred pages. Even the lengthy Goblet of Fire takes only a few hours to read. Nevertheless, I enjoy the series. The movies feel the same way to me. I like them a lot. I think they are masterfully done. But, once again, they feel rushed, like one can never really be a part of that world. This most recent Potter movie gave me that feeling the most acutely. I understand what I should be feeling, but I don't feel it deep inside of me. Whenever a certain tragic death occurs in the movie, for example, I should feel sorrowful. And I can't because I can't ever feel anything for these characters, so I put on a sad face in the darkness of the theatre to oblige the director. When I see the dragons flying, the wizards casting spells, and the underwater world being explored, I know I should be enraptured, enchanted, and totally engrossed by them, but I just can't be. Still, it's a load of fun to see it. I just can't feel it in my core the way I felt it with Star Wars, Jurassic Park, and The Matrix. Those movies truly expected you to dive into their respective universes and become a part of them. With Harry Potter, I'm a spectator not a participant.

General reaction after the show: Jose, Hugo, and Hector liked it. Daneaya, like always, tried to convince herself that she liked it more than she really did. She's such an optimist; I love that. Andrea, I could tell, didn't like it, though she politely nodded agreement with the others. After I commented that it was a bit too long, she said, "I know!" - nakedly exposing her opinon.


Katie Leung plays Harry's love interest in the movie. In this movie, there are a lot more black, Indian, and Asian people than I remembered in the previous ones.

Sentiments about the Sarah Silverman appearance on Conan

Thanks to good friend, Joshua, I was alerted to an appearance by none other than the beautiful, talented Jewish comedienne Sarah Silverman.

Unfortunately, the interview was extremely lackluster. Neither seemed that into the interview, (perhaps they were hoping to avoid the same fiasco of last time?) and no real good humor came out of either one of them. It would seem that two comedians could feed off of each other and create a spectacle, but both seemed wary and subdued.

Also, what was with the clip from "Jesus is Magic?" Conan noticed the senselessness of it by thanking Rosario Dawson for the clip in addition to Silverman. It seemed like Silverman was presenting a clip of Rosario Dawson in a movie. Where was Silverman during all of that? Yeah, singing, I know, but come on, Sarah. Humor me.

Update: Aayla Secura

This explains a little about the origin of the beautiful Twi'Lek Jedi Knight called Aayla Secura.

The character was originally created for the Expanded Universe by artist Jan Duursema and writer John Ostrander, but Jon Foster's striking cover art for issue # 33 of the ongoing Star Wars title from Dark Horse Comics (see below) made a definite impression on writer/director George Lucas, and the character was placed in the film.

During the Clone Wars, which were portrayed in the Cartoon Newtork series, "The Clone Wars" which won an Emmy, Aayla Secura became a general in charge of a garrison of clone troopers. The second picture below shows her injured after the Battle of Hypori, where we first encounter the sinister General Grievous. Ki-Adi Mundi, a Cerean and one of the wisest Jedi Knights, looks on with concern.

Personal News

I've decided to begin posting on MSN Spaces. I'll continue to post here, but my posts will also be on MSN Spaces. As of yet, I haven't transferred any of my posts from here to MSN Spaces, nor do I plan to do so. Also, I might post different things on each site from time to time. I'll see how that goes. As it is, I've posted something on Darwin on MSN Spaces, which I don't plan on posting here for a while.

The address is http://spaces.msn.com/members/ernestalba

More than anything: she scares me.

You have favorite artists or a favorite artist. And, though they are absolutely your long-term favorite, you take breaks from their music, especially if they don't come out with new music. But when you come back to their music, and listen to it again, you realize all over again how incredible they are. I love getting that feeling. I got that feeling tonight. Sunday night is usually study night here in Spanish House. People begin to realize that the weekend doesn't last forever, and you've got to prepare for Monday and the rest of the week. I was sitting at my desk, studying for Japanese, and letting iTunes go down the list. After playing a few really good songs, including Sammy Kershaw's "She Don't Know She's Beautiful", Tony Bennett's "Fly Me To The Moon", Shirley Bassey's "Goldfinger", The Scorpions' "No One Like You", Sarah Evans' "Could Not Ask For More", "Wonderboy" by Tenacious D,"William Tell Overture" by Rossini, and "What A Wonderful World This Would Be" by Sam Cooke, it finally got to a song I hadn't heard in a long time. Several weeks, probably. "Eternally" by Utada Hikaru. Listening to her sing, I felt a shiver go up my spine. I had forgotten how haunting her voice is. I had forgotten how beautiful her melodies are. Most importantly, I had remembered all of that now.

Utada Hikaru, among composers, musicians, and singers, you are great.

Sarah Silverman (1970-)

Note: Much of this post is taken from an article by The New Yorker and an article on Roger Ebert's website.

The following is a haphazard and disorganized collection of Sarah Silverman's jokes and anecdotes. If you don't know, Sarah Silverman is a Jewish comedienne (though she hates being called that: "People are always introducing me as 'Sarah Silverman, Jewish comedienne.' I HATE that! I wish people would see me for who I really am- I'm white!"). Her innocent look, perfect grammar and diction, and sometimes sing-song delivery is in direct contrast to much of her material, which deals with controversial topics such as racism, abortion, rape, body hair, scatology, and child abuse, among others; her comedy-acts are sometimes performed from a caricatured or stereotypical Jewish-American perspective.

She is a great comedian. She has a new movie, Jesus is Magic, out in theatres. Though I haven't seen it yet, I will, and I suggest you do, too.

“I’m just sensitive,” she says onstage. “My skin is paper thin. People don’t realize it, because I’m sassy and I’m brassy, but I just— I see these care commercials with these little African kids with the giant bellies and the flies, and these are one- and two-year-old babies, nine months pregnant, and it breaks my heart in two.” As the audience reacts, she presses on. “It breaks my heart in half. And I don’t give money, because”—out of the side of her mouth—“I don’t want them to spend it on drugs, but I give. You know I give. I, this past summer, sent fifteen really fun cowl-neck sweaters to this village in Africa, in really fun colors—expecting nothing, by the way—and they culled their money together, whatever they call it, and bought a stamp and sent me a postcard thanking me, and it said thank you and that they had enough sweaters for every single member of the village to get one and that they were delicious.”

"I wear this St. Christopher medal sometimes because—I’m Jewish, but my boyfriend is Catholic—it was cute the way he gave it to me. He said if it doesn’t burn through my skin it will protect me." (Sarah Silverman's long-time boyfriend is Jimmy Kimmel, the comedian and host of Jimmy Kimmel Live on ABC.)

In another of her bits, she invokes the events of September 11th: “They were devastating. They were beyond devastating. I don’t want to say especially for these people, or especially for these people, but especially for me, because it happened to be the same exact day that I found out that the soy chai latte was, like, nine hundred calories. I had been drinking them every day. You hear soy, you think healthy. And it’s a lie."

“I was raped by a doctor,” she says. “Which is so bittersweet for a Jewish girl.”

Silverman takes Lenny Bruce’s “Jews killed Christ” joke (“I did it. My family. . . . Not only did we kill Christ, we’re going to kill him when he comes back” a step further: “Everybody blames the Jews for killing Christ,” Silverman says. “And then the Jews try to pass it off on the Romans. I’m one of the few people that believe it was the blacks.”(The joke exposes not the ancient perfidy of any particular race but the absurdity of blaming entire races for anything.)

"I'm going out with a guy who's half-black, who's totally going to break my heart......Oh my God. I can't believe I said that. I'm so negative. He's half-white."

A few years ago, Silverman was invited to tell some jokes on “Late Night with Conan O’Brien.” In one of them, she describes trying to get out of jury duty by writing something disqualifyingly biased on the form. A friend suggests she write “I hate Chinks,” and, worried that people will think she’s racist, she writes, “I love Chinks.” Before the taping, she says, she was told that she could say “spic” or “Jew” but not “Chink.” She decided to say it anyway. “Jew would be funny if I wasn’t Jewish,” she says. “But it has to be offensive, it can’t be a self-deprecating thing. Then I thought, If you’re saying I can say spic, I’m going to say Chink, because it’s a funnier-sounding word. You know? It’s got the ‘ch-’ and the ‘k-.’ I needed the most offensive word I could use on television.”

The network aired the joke uncensored, and Guy Aoki, of the Media Action Network for Asian Americans, an advocacy group, protested until the network apologized. Then Silverman and Aoki had a debate on Bill Maher’s “Politically Incorrect.” Aoki, who lives in an apartment in Glendale littered with videotapes of programs he has monitored, arrived with, as he says, “two pages of sound bites” and a crowd of supporters. Silverman got frustrated—“It’s not a racist joke,” she said; “it’s a joke about racism”—and called Aoki a “douche bag.”

“It’s stupid to ever, ever defend your material,” she says now. “If you don’t like it, then you know what? It’s no good. It’s subjective.”

Silverman has since turned the complaint into grist for her stand-up act, saying that the experience helped teach her the important lesson that racism is bad: “And I mean bad, like in that black way.”

“Jesus Is Magic,” which comes out this month, contains Silverman’s most authentic response to the accusation of racism. She says: "I got in trouble for saying the word “Chink” on a talk show, a network talk show. It was in the context of a joke. Obviously. That’d be weird. That’d be a really bad career choice if it wasn’t. But, nevertheless, the president of an Asian-American watchdog group out here in Los Angeles, his name is Guy Aoki, and he was up in arms about it and he put my name in the papers calling me a racist, and it hurt. As a Jew—as a member of the Jewish community—I was really concerned that we were losing control of the media. Right? What kind of a world do we live in where a totally cute white girl can’t say “Chink” on network television? It’s like the fifties. It’s scary. There are only two Asian people that I know that I have any problem with, at all. One is, uh, Guy Aoki. The other is my friend Steve, who actually went pee-pee in my Coke. He’s all, ‘Me Chinese, me play joke.’ Uh, if you have to explain it, Steve, it’s not funny."

A desired post-9/11 advertisement for a major airline? "American Airlines: First Through the Towers."

Other times the approach is a little more straightforward, as in her song that mixes simplistic romantic and racist clichés with an irresistibly bubble-gummy pop tune:

    I love you more than bears love honey
    I love you more than Jews love money
    I love you more than Asians are good at math
    I love you even if it's not hip,
    I love you more than black people don't tip...

"The best time to have a baby is when you're a black teenager."

When she treats abortion as if it were the most off-hand thing in the world, she makes you see the absurdity and superficiality of "pro-life" depictions of The Kinds Of Women Who Seek Abortions, as if an abortion itself was an enjoyable activity worth compulsively or spontaneously craving: "I was going to get an abortion the other day. I totally wanted an abortion — and it turns out I was just thirsty."

"I want to get an abortion, but my boyfriend and I are having trouble conceiving."

She tells a story about her "favorite niece" (the one she loves more than "the other one"), who told her she learned in school that Hitler killed 60 million Jews. Sarah corrects her -- It was six million -- and her niece says dismissively, "Yeah, whatever. What's the difference?" Aunt Sarah delivers a stern rebuke: "I'll tell you the difference, young lady: 60 million would be unforgivable!" What does that mean? (If you think about it, it's basically the same joke as George C. Scott's estimates of "acceptable casualties" after a nuclear war in "Dr. Strangelove.")

...begins hosting an insufferably cheery and condescending morning show "for the ladies" in which they announce such guests as "Dr. Goodsex... who will show you how to make your husband climax faster so he can get on with his busy day!"

* "When God gives you AIDS, make lemon-AIDS!"

Top 12 things Yoda says in the bedroom

    1. "Ahhh! Yoda's little friend you seek!"
    2. "Urm. Put a shield on my saber I must."
    3. "Feel the force!"
    4. "Foreplay, cuddling - a Jedi craves not these things."
    5. "Down here, I am. Find a ladder, I must!"
    6. "Do me or do me not - there is no try."
    7. "Early must I rise. Leave now you must!"
    8. "You know, this would be a lot more fun without Frank Oz's hand up my....."
    9. "Happens to every guy sometimes this does."
    10. "When 900 years old you get, Viagra you need too, hmmmmm?"
    11. "Ow, ow, OW! On my ear you are!"
    12. "Who's your Jedi master? WHO'S your Jedi Master?"
Lifted unceremoniously from: http://spaces.msn.com/members/caralousie54/

The Hottest Jedi Knight

Aayla Secura (c.42 BBY - 19 BBY)

Biography: Aayla was a female Twi'lek who was always strong with the Force. She was born and raised on Ryloth, the home planet of the Twi'Lek race.When she was training as a Padawan, her master was Quinlan Vos, a Kiffar who had recently lost his memories but maintained his Jedi ways.

Aayla was an empathic and highly intelligent Jedi with impressive fighting skills and a master of Form IV Lightsaber Combat, called Ataru. However, she never sat on the Jedi High Council.

When the Clone Wars began in the year 22 BBY, Aayla became a general in charge of a garrison of clone troopers. She was hospitalized after the attack by General Grievous during the Battle of Hypori, but eventually returned to the battlefield.

In the year 19 BBY, as the end of the Clone Wars drew near, Chancellor Palpatine gave the order to exterminate all the Jedi, the final step in his elaborate plan to assume complete control over the Republic. Aayla Secura, a Jedi Knight, was gunned down by her troops on the lush planet of Felucia. The following shot from Revenge of the Sith captures the moment before her death.

In Revenge of the Sith and Attack of the Clones, Aayla Secura is played by Amy Allen, a Production Assistant for several blockbuster movies, including Elektra, The Hunted, Gangs of New York, Pearl Harbor, and A.I.

Note: Amy Allen is the one on the left.

Note: Is it just me or does the Twi'Lek race produce especially hot females? Jabba the Hutt employed Twi'Lek dancers, two beautiful Twi'Lek masseurs also occupy the Star Wars universe, and now Secura...I just looked it up and, indeed, Twi'Lek females are known for their exceptional beauty.

The Most Beautiful Actress Alive

By many accounts, including Richard Roeper's and mine, Zhang Ziyi is the most beautiful actress in Hollywood. She is beautiful in every sense of the word. I speak not at all of her personality, intelligence, or even acting ability. I am merely glorfying the beauty her genetic predisposition has given her. Her beauty isn't her fault. She had nothing to do with it. If anyone, I guess God granted it to her. It is only chance, though, that we are able to see her beauty in several Hollywood pictures, including "Rush Hour 2", "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon", "Hero", "House of Flying Daggers", and the hotly anticipated "Memoirs of a Geisha." I thank God for that. So, without further ado, I present to you....Zhang Ziyi, the most beautiful actress in Hollywood.

Zhang Ziyi (1979-)

And for those naysayers out there, who say "Oh, but anyone can look hot with tons of make-up and lighting and wardrobe and photoshop" I give you the following picture at a conference where she was sitting just like everyone else. She looks just as perfect. Maybe even more so.

Serial Killers

Traumatized from Saw and Saw II, I looked on the internet for assurance that the acts in the movie are only possible in Hollywood fiction. Below is the sad proof that it is, in fact, reality.

Jeffrey Dahmer (1960-1994)

Dahmer was born to a Christian fundamentalist father in Milwaukee, Wisconsin. At age eight, his family moved to Bath, Ohio, near Akron. From his earliest youth he was extremely shy and, according to his father, was molested by a neighbor. He collected dead animals and showed signs of necrophilia, but this was revealed only at his trial. He was also a closeted alcoholic and homosexual and suffered from extremely low self-esteem. His parents divorced when he was in his teens. He committed his first murder at the age of 18, killing a young man, Steven Hicks, he had invited to his house because Dahmer "didn't want him to leave."

He later attended college but performed poorly. His father convinced him to join the military, and he appeared to recover some vitality as he became an army medic. In 1988, however, he was arrested for sexually fondling a 13-year-old boy, for which he served one year in a work release camp and was required to register as a sex offender. Shortly afterward, he began the string of murders that ended with his arrest in 1991.

Most of his victims were African American men whom he subjected to sexual assaults. His main goal was for a completely compliant sexual partner, essentially making necrophilia his motivation for killing. He achieved notoriety after his arrest following the discovery of several decaying bodies in acid vats in his apartment. Severed heads were found in his refrigerator and an altar of candles and human skulls were found in his closet. Accusations soon surfaced that Dahmer had practiced necrophilia and cannibalism. Dahmer admitted to eating the biceps of his eighth victim, Ernest Miller, whose skeleton he also kept, noting that human flesh "tasted like beef" to him.

Dahmer reportedly had a history of abandonment and feared loss and rejection. After a bitter divorce, his mother left with his brother, David, leaving Dahmer behind on the assumption that his father would care for him. However, his father had previously left as well, refusing to speak with his wife, with each not knowing the other's whereabouts. Dahmer, at 17 having just graduated high school and without money, was left alone in a home with no food and a broken refrigerator. It is thought that these feelings of abandonment, filtered through his mental illness, created the internal logic that allowed him to justify his actions to himself.

On July 22, 1991, with handcuffs still attached to one wrist, another man, Tracy Edwards, was able to successfully escape from Dahmer's apartment and flag down a police squad car. Police were led back to Dahmer's apartment where the remains of eleven victims were found. Dahmer reportedly scuffled with police trying to arrest him as the remains were being discovered. After being charged with fifteen counts of murder, he entered a plea of not guilty by reason of insanity. On February 17, 1992, a court rejected his plea of insanity and sentenced Dahmer to fifteen consecutive life sentences, which required a minimum of 936 years' imprisonment.

Dennis Nilsen (1944-)

Nilsen was born in Strichen, Aberdeenshire to a Scottish mother and a Norwegian father. His father was an alcoholic and his parents divorced when he was four years old. His mother remarried and sent her son to his grandparents, but after a couple of years, he was sent back to his mother again.

Nilsen claimed the first traumatic event to shape his life came about when he was a small child, when his beloved grandfather died. His strict Catholic mother insisted that he view the body before burial. Whether this incident, or his mother and stepfather's lectures on the "impurities of the flesh" helped shape him into what he was to become, no one really knows.

In 1961, Nilsen enlisted in the British Army and became a cook in Aden, Cyprus and Berlin. He left the army in 1972 and served briefly as a police officer. From the mid 1970s, Nilsen worked as a civil servant in a jobcentre.

He had a series of superficial, transient relationships with men, but they did not help to placate his profound isolation and loneliness. Like Jeffrey Dahmer, he sought somebody "who wouldn't leave." He wanted a corpse.

All his victims were students or homeless men whom he picked up in bars and brought to his house either for sex or just for company. Nilsen strangled and drowned his victims during the night, waking up with little memory of what he had done. He used his butchering skills, learnt in the army, to help him dispose of the bodies. Nilsen had access to a large garden and was able to burn many of the remains in a bonfire. In 1981, however, Nilsen moved to an upstairs flat. As his murders continued, he found it difficult to dispose of the remains and had suitcases full of human organs stored in his wardrobe, and plastic bags with human remains under the floorboards. Neighbours had begun to notice the smell. When he tried to dispose of the bodies by flushing them down the toilet, he blocked the sewerage of his house in Muswell Hill (23 Cranley Gardens), north London. Dennis Nilsen was arrested in 1983 on suspicion of multiple murder. He apologized to the police for not being able to tell them the exact number of people he had killed. When his house was searched, they found three heads in a cupboard, and they found thirteen more bodies in Nilsen's former place of residence at Cricklewood at 195 Melrose Avenue. During the trial at Old Bailey, Nilsen was cold and distant, and seemed utterly unaffected by the fact that he had murdered fifteen people. He was sentenced to life in prison. Nilsen's minimum term was set at 25 years by the trial judge, but the Home Secretary later imposed a whole life tariff, which meant he would never be released. But after the Home Secretary was stripped of his powers to set minimum terms in November 2002, Nilsen could be freed on life licence in 2008 because of his original 25-year minimum sentence.

John Wayne Gacy (1942-1994)

Gacy was born and raised a Catholic in Chicago, Illinois. He had a very troubled and distant relationship with his stern, abusive father. He worked briefly in Las Vegas, Nevada, before returning to Illinois. He attended a business college and began a moderately successful career as a shoe salesman in Springfield, Illinois, where he became a prominent member of the Jaycees. In 1964 he married and moved to Waterloo, Iowa, where he managed a Kentucky Fried Chicken restaurant belonging to his wife's family. However, Gacy's first marriage fell apart after he was convicted of child molestation. He was sent to prison for this crime; after he was released, he moved back to Illinois. He successfully hid this criminal record until police began investigating him for his later murders. In 1975, he bought a house in an unincorporated area surrounded by the Chicago neighborhood of Norwood Park, living there with his widowed mother, and established his own construction business, PDM Contracting. He married a woman he had known since high school, and his and her two daughters moved in with him and his mother moved out. He became a prominent and respected member of the community. In addition to his clown act, he became a committee member for the Democratic Party. In this capacity, he was even able to meet and be photographed with then-First Lady Rosalynn Carter.

It was also during this time that he claimed his first known victim, a teenage boy he picked up at a bus depot. His marriage fell apart and his wife divorced him in mid-1976. Gacy began a double life: respected member of the community by day, sexual predator and murderer by night. No suspicion fell on him until late 1978, when he was investigated following the disappearance of a teenage boy, Robert Piest, who was last seen with Gacy. A search of his house, by Des Plaines detective Joseph Kozenczak, revealed a number of incriminating items related to other disappearances. In December 1978 Gacy went to the police and confessed. He claimed he had first killed in January 1972. He confessed to 33 murders, indicating where the bodies were in 28 of the cases—buried under his house. The other five he said were thrown into the Des Plaines River. Most of the victims were young male prostitutes. Some victims were also teenage boys whom Gacy had hired through his contracting firm. Bodies were uncovered from December 1978 to April 1979, when the last known victim was found downstream in the Illinois River.

On May 10, 1994, Gacy was executed in Stateville Penitentiary near Joliet, Illinois, by lethal injection. According to reports, Gacy did not express remorse. His last words were to the effect that killing him would not bring anyone back, and he is reported to have said "You can kiss my ass," to a guard while he was being sent to the execution chamber.

Some have pointed to his poor relationship with his abusive, alcoholic father, his head trauma and subsequent blackouts in his teenage years as some basis for his acts. During his time on Death Row, Gacy took up oil painting, and his favorite subject was painting portraits of clowns. He claimed to have used his clown act as an alter ego, once sardonically saying that "A clown can get away with murder." After his execution, his paintings were sold at auction. Reportedly, the main buyer destroyed the paintings after winning the bids.

Aileen Wuornos (1956-2002)

Born in Rochester, Michigan, Wuornos had what was by most accounts a traumatic childhood. Her father, a psychopathic child molester left her mother before Aileen was born, and later committed suicide in prison when she was 13 (1969). Her mother abandoned her and her brother, Keith, in 1960, leaving them in the care of their grandparents, Lauri and Britta Wuornos.

Wuornos later said that Lauri physically and sexually abused her as a child, that Britta was an abusive alcoholic, and that they both claimed to be her actual parents until she was twelve, when she found out the truth. She also claimed to have had sex with multiple partners, including her brother, at a young age.

A storeowner in Palm Harbor, Florida, named Richard Mallory took a ride with Wuornos on November 30, 1989, and became her first victim. Over the next two years, five subsequent victims were found; one other is still missing. Wuornos was eventually identified when she and her girlfriend Tyria Moore had an accident while driving a victim's car. She was apprehended a few months later. Wuornos cited self-defense for Mallory's murder, maintaining that he had attempted to rape her. She was convicted for this first murder in January 1992 with help from Moore's testimony. fter her first death sentence, Wuornos often said she wanted it all to be over. In 2001 she began fighting to be executed as soon as possible. She petitioned the Florida Supreme Court for the right to fire her legal counsel and stop all appeals, wording her request so as to forestall any objection: "I'm one who seriously hates human life and would kill again." Due to her mental instability, some have argued that she was in no state for them to honor such a request. Wuornos was executed by lethal injection (which she requested instead of the electric chair) at 9:47 a.m., Wednesday, 9 October 2002. Her last words:

"I'd just like to say I'm sailing with the Rock and I'll be back like Independence Day with Jesus, June 6, like the movie, big mothership and all. I'll be back."

After her execution she was cremated, and her ashes were taken to her native Michigan and spread around a tree.

She had requested that Natalie Merchant's (from the group 10,000 Maniacs) song "Carnival" be played at her funeral. Natalie Merchant commented on this when asked why her song was run during the credits of the documentary Aileen: Life and Death of a Serial Killer.

"When director Nick Broomfield sent a working edit of the film, I was so disturbed by the subject matter that I couldn't even watch it. Aileen Wuornos led a tortured, torturing life that is beyond my worst nightmares. It wasn't until I was told that Aileen spent many hours listening to my album Tigerlily while on death row and requested 'Carnival' be played at her funeral that I gave permission for the use of the song. It's very odd to think of the places my music can go once it leaves my hands. If it gave her some solace, I have to be grateful."

Ted Bundy (1946-1989)

Bundy was born in 1946, in Burlington, Vermont. His mother, Eleanor Louise Cowell, was a young department store clerk. His father's identity has never been authoritatively established. For the first few years of his life, Bundy and his mother lived with his mentally unstable grandfather in Philadelphia. At age four, he appeared at his aunt's bed one morning, smiling as he brandished several knives and put them beside her in bed. Bundy and his mother soon thereafter moved to Tacoma, Washington, where her uncle Jack taught music at the College of Puget Sound.

Friends generally recalled Bundy as a happy, normal child. He was a good, if not spectacular, student at Woodrow Wilson High School, and was active in the Methodist Church and the Boy Scouts. However, as he told Stephen Michaud and Hugh Aynesworth, authors of Bundy's definitive biography The Only Living Witness, he had no natural sense of how to get along with other people. "I didn't know what made people want to be friends," he told the authors. "I didn't know what made people attractive to one another. I didn't know what underlay social interactions."

The extroverted Bundy worked and campaigned for the Republican Party as an adult. He also worked as a volunteer at a Seattle rape crisis center. Bundy had one serious relationship with a college freshman only known to the public as "Stephanie Brooks." At one point she ended the relationship due to a lack of ambitiousness on Bundy's part, and they separated for a period of roughly two years. He eventually courted her again and then proposed. She agreed to marry him. Two days later, he unceremoniously dumped her by ceasing to return her phone calls. It was shortly after this final breakup that Bundy began a homicidal rampage lasting three years.

While some believe Bundy may have started killing in his early to mid-teens — a twelve-year-old neighbor vanished from her house when Bundy was fourteen — the earliest verified murders began in 1974, when he was 27. Shortly after midnight on 4 January 1974, Bundy entered the house of Joni Lenz, an 18-year-old student at the University of Washington, and bludgeoned her with a crowbar while she slept. Bundy also removed a bed rod from Lenz's bed and used it to sexually assault her. She was found the next morning, in a coma, lying in a pool of blood. Lenz survived the attack, but suffered permanent brain damage. Bundy's next victim was Lynda Ann Healy, a senior at the University of Washington. On 31 January 1974, Bundy broke into her room, knocked her unconscious, meticulously removed her clothes and dressed her in jeans and a shirt, wrapped her in bedsheet, and carried her outside. A single hair would be found at the crime scene which did not belong to the victim. A year would pass before her decapitated, dismembered remains were found. From that January to June he stalked and killed more than one young woman a month, a spree that culminated in July with the double daytime abduction and murder of two females at a lakeside park near Seattle. He murdered approximately ten victims in Oregon, Utah and Washington. Bundy had a remarkable advantage as his facial features were charming, yet not especially memorable. He would be later described as a chameleon, able to look totally different by making only minor adjustments to his appearance, e.g., changing his hairstyle. That autumn, Bundy moved on to Utah, where he raped, sodomized and strangled a 17-year old girl. Her body was found nine days later. Next was Laura Aime, also 17, who disappeared on Halloween. Her remains were found nearly a month later.

In Murray, Utah, on November 8, 1974, dressed as a cop, Bundy lured Carol DaRonch into his car where he then attempted to slap a pair of handcuffs on her. Fortunately for DaRonch, he only got one wrist. She wrenched her door open with the other hand and escaped. Bundy was later captured and convicted of DaRonch's kidnapping on June 30, 1976. He was sentenced to one to 15 years in Utah State Prison. Colorado authorities, in the meantime, were pursuing their murder cases.

On June 7, 1977, in preparation for a hearing in his murder trial, Bundy was transported to the Pitkin County, Colorado, courthouse. During a court recess, he was allowed to visit the courthouse's law library. Bundy jumped from a second-story window and escaped, injuring his ankle, which caused him to remain in the area. He was recaptured a week later. In jail, he somehow acquired a hacksaw and managed to saw a hole in the ceiling. On the night of December 30, 1977, Bundy climbed out of the hole, and was able to walk right out the jail's front door. He stole a car in the parking lot.

He flew from Denver to Chicago, caught an Amtrak train to Ann Arbor, Michigan, then stole a car which he ditched in Atlanta before boarding a bus for Tallahassee. There, in the early hours of Super Bowl Sunday 1978, he bludgeoned two sleeping women to death and seriously wounded two others inside their Chi Omega sorority house. On February 9, 1978, Bundy traveled to Lake City, Florida. While there, he abducted and murdered 12-year-old Kimberly Leach. Bundy was later stopped by a police officer in Pensacola. When the officer called in a check of Bundy's license plate, the orange VW he was driving came up as stolen. Before long, Bundy was identified and taken to Miami to stand trial for the Chi Omega murders. After being convicted, Bundy was sentenced to death. During the trial, he married Carole Ann Boone, a former coworker and admirer. During his incarceration, Bundy received hundreds of fan letters from female admirers. In October 1982, Boone gave birth to a girl, whom Bundy adored. Eventually, however, Boone moved away, divorced him, and changed her and her daughter's last name.

The night before Bundy was executed, he gave a television interview to Dr. James Dobson, head of the Christian organization Focus on the Family. Bundy claimed that consumption of violent pornography helped "shape and mold" his violence into "behavior too terrible to describe." Bundy said that he felt that violence in the media, "particularly sexualized violence," sent boys "down the road to being Ted Bundys." It is noteworthy that Bundy had never blamed pornography until this interview and no pornographic materials were found at his home when it was searched. According to Hagmaier, Bundy also contemplated suicide in the days leading up to his execution, but eventually decided against it. In 1989, 42-year-old Bundy was electrocuted in Florida. His last words were, "I'd like you to give my love to my family and friends."

Review: Saw and Saw II

I saw "Saw" today. I saw "Saw II", too.

I haven't been this disturbed since I saw "The Ring."

I'm not a big fan of horror movies. I've seen very few, and I've seen even fewer that I've liked. The reason is that I usually can't find anything worth seeing in them. They are as bad as the many action movies or teen drama movies that plague movie theatres. Cheap thrills, gratuitous violence, nudity, and profanity are the rewards you reap from horror flicks. Occasionally, there comes an intelligent horror movie. They become cult classics. "The Shining", "The Exorcist", "Nosferatu", "Psycho", "Texas Chainsaw Massacre", more recently, "The Silence of the Lambs", "The Sixth Sense", and "The Ring" are just some of the great horror movies in history.

"Saw" and "Saw II" do not join them in the annals of great cinema history, but they almost make the list. They are immensely disturbing and hard to watch. Both stretch the human mind to its limit; I believe if I were put through what these people were put through, I would lose my sanity. My mind would split into a million pieces and the shards would pierce through whatever semblance of reality I could sense with my body. I would fall into a state of eternal shock, unable to escape from the doorless, windowless room of my empty head. I can't muster words to recount the emotional stress these movies caused me. They rely not on cheap camera angles that suddenly reveal scary images, instead they rely on a psychological terror that is much more penetrating and lasting. This is the secret to the success of a horror movie, of any movie, in the long run. It must affect us for us to care about it. These movies make us care. They make us think about our lives. Deeply.

A quick summary of these movies: The original "Saw" creates a serial killer nicknamed "Jigsaw" who puts his victims through "games" in which they must choose to live or die. Living usually requires doing something they really don't want to do. For example, one poor soul wakes up with a metal device around his head. (This example is from Saw II, but it gives you the gist of the game.) He is locked inside of a room with no immediately noticeable way of getting out. A TV turns on suddenly. A clown puppet appears and informs him that the device will close around his head, smashing it into a pulp in a certain amount of time. The only way to escape from that grisly death is to find the key to unlock the device. The twisted part is that the key is located behind his eye. He must dig out his eye to get behind it to get the key. And this is the gist of these "Saw" movies. Yes, it involves people that we should root for, hope that escape from the sick games they are playing. That's pretty much it for plot. These movies are truly perverse, twisted, and brutally violent. Horror enthusiasts should love them. Others might think they are fun to watch. As for me, I was saddened and disturbed by these movies. After leaving "Saw II", I could not stop shaking my head. I suppose I was trying to remove the images I had just seen from my head. But they are still in there. And they will stay there. If you are sensitive to violence, I strongly urge you to NOT watch these movies.

We are sick. Why are we fascinated by abominations? We look away, but peek back. We delight in misery - our misery and the misery of others. Violence, hatred, and despicable acts of cruelty foment feelings of raw energy, emotion, and excitement. Despicable! That is what we are. When we glorify these things, we renege on our promise to encourage, hope for, and save life. This is your only life. The clock is ticking, and you don't know when time will run out. Live and be at peace.

The Luckiest Man in the World

President Bush is on the verge of becoming the luckiest man in the history of civilization. Despite a legacy of ineptitude in academics, business ventures, and politics, George W. Bush has managed to be at the top of the food chain. He attended Yale University, he ran a large oil company (into the ground), he was the governor of Texas for 8 years, and now he has been elected President of the United States of America twice. It seems, though, that he has been served his comeuppance, finally. His ratings are extremely low, he has caused a seemingly unjustified, expensive, and politically self-destructive war, and his administration is reeling from scandals. Liberals can confidently wear their "Don't blame me - I voted for Kerry" t-shirts.

At least for now.

Because, in case any one has forgotten, Iraq is going to be a democracy. Despite seemingly insurmountable negative opinon from countries around the world, including America itself, Bush has remained steadfast in his plan for Iraq. Come December 11, Iraqis will elect a new parliament to run the country, and we will know whether Bush's plan works or continues to fail miserably. But Iraq's struggle for democracy is not entirely a domestic conern. Middle Eastern nations are watching closely. If democracy succeeds in Iraq, it could potentially sweep over the entire region, bringing a lasting peace to this war-scarred region.

Bush's presidency is approaching its end. Historians will begin writing his chapter in the history books. For good or for bad, George W. Bush has made a major impact in history. How will he be remembered? As a stubborn liar, squanderer of prosperity, and incompetent leader? Or as the hero who brought lasting peace to millions in despair?

Best Five Moments in Star Wars History

WARNING!!! Spoilers ahead!!!

Top five moments

We asked a Jedi Council of Star Wars fans for favorite moments. The top five, and how to cue them on DVD:

1. Darth Vader tells Luke Skywalker, 'No, I am your father!'

Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back, Chapter 46; 1 hour, 51 minutes

"Nobody saw that coming," says Philip Wise, 28, of Southlake, Texas, who operates the Rebel Scum Web site (www.rebelscum.com).

2. Obi-Wan and Anakin cross lightsabers

Episode III: Revenge of the Sith, Chapter 38; 1 hour, 47 minutes, 30 seconds

This clash between master and pupil on the volcanic planet of Mustafar "is edge-of-your-seat saber choreography at its best," says Anne Neumann, 30, of Austin.

3. Han Solo is frozen in carbonite

The Empire Strikes Back, Chapter 40; 1 hour, 35 minutes

" With the dad revelation, this sets up the first feature-length cliffhanger in movie history," says Scott Chitwood, 32, of Houston, a founder of TheForce.net, a Star Wars news Web site.

4. The Imperial Star Destroyer flies over

Episode IV: A New Hope, Chapter 3; 2 minutes, 11 seconds

"The beginning of a lifelong obsession started here," Wise says.

5. Saving Luke's life, Vader is redeemed

Episode IV: A New Hope, Chapter 3; 2 minutes, 11 seconds

"It is the reason we sit through 12 hours of Star Wars," says Dave Myatt, 32, of Vancouver, B.C.